a month later

prog·ress (prŏg'rěs', -rəs, prō'grěs')

n. Movement, as toward a goal; advance.

Development or growth Steady improvement

Baby steps, but in the right direction.  It's been a little over a month that I've been training with my heart rate. As I tell my clients while teaching, there's always a level of resistance with change; it's human nature. There are moments when you question if the effort is worth it, and if it will yield the anticipated results.

The beginning was a struggle, I won't even lie.  But the bloggers who commented on this type of training warned me that it would be, and so did all the articles I found while researching it.  It was more of a mental challenge than physical.  My body appreciated slowing down, making the runs less exhausting.  My mind on the other-hand had difficulty swallowing it's pride.  The "internal" conversations have included the following:

Mind: You've gone much faster than this, why don't you challenge yourself anymore? Are you giving up already?

Body: I'm not listening to you brain -- and don't bother sending out the entire army of endorphins.  I'm already happy being out here running, I don't need you sabotaging my efforts.

Ego: this sucks. really really sucks.

Lungs: You're running, and able to talk without huffing and puffing?? ... this is new.

Heart: It's nice that you're out there keeping my healthy while not making me work extra hard like you used to... all the time.  I promise to repay you when you decide to add some tougher, faster workouts back in, but for now, i thank you.

I missed yesterday's planned 3k easy run due to some other big girl stuff I had to take care of, so I decided to head out at lunch today instead.  Quick check of the weather, showed 9℃ so I decided on a UA Cold Gear shirt, UA Cold Gear fleece jacket.  No hat, no gloves.  It's above freezing, it must be warm!

WRONG.  Turned the corner, and I was f-r-e-e-z-i-n-g, and the rain started. One of those cold, damp days, the temperature quickly plummeting.  My arms quickly shrunk into my jacket to keep my hands warm, and I tried turtling my head into the neck of the jacket... didn't work.  Wind picked up.  But, I'm Canadian, I've dealt with worse dammit.

With my arms in the sleeves, of course it hid my Polar display, so I wasn't keeping a constant eye on my heart rate. Wind and hills are two things that increase my heart rate, so I tried to be conscious of slowing down; aware of my perceived effort.  I've learned to be much more in tune to my body and know when I'm pushing the pace and heart rate a little too high. Once I reached about 2k and was heading back home, the rain had stopped, and wind was behind me, feeling better.  Finished my short 3.5k.  

My zone 2 is 153-163 bpm.  I'm usually in the high end of this range, sometimes a few beats over, but for outdoor runs, I was told when I got the lactic threshold test to allow my heart rate to do what it wants, and go by my perceived effort/speed.  By the time I synced up my run, I had no idea what to expect since I wasn't watching the numbers while running.

Average heart rate was 164, 1 bpm higher than my desired average... but my average speed of 5.3 mph was in the perfect zone.  With a few hills/wind/body feeling cold/rain, I'm stoked that I stayed where I should be!  The best part?  The pace is roughly 45 sec/km faster than when I started monitoring my heart rates. (I know, i know, i'm all over the place between Imperial and metric...lol) I'm actually "slowly running" the whole time now, rather than slowing to walk several times to control my heart rate.  This is exciting!

The situation which I posted about a few weeks ago is also progressing.  I've made my choice, done something about it, and have dealt with the most difficult part.  I am very hopeful I've made the right choice.  I think I slept soundly last night for the first time in a long time.  If running can help me dealt with the emotions of guilt, fear, heartache, unknown, sadness, then I will be running a lot of miles.  But I still think I will be happier in the end.

Lastly, something very very positive has happened in the last few days thanks to BeachRunner, his post from the other day, and the blogosphere.  I have never been so happy to "put myself out there".  I have connected with Ted and his family about something that is very near and dear to my heart.  Have you ever questioned posting something, wondered if you should, and tried to understand why you feel the need to write about it?  Yesterday, I got my answer. Thank you again BR!