I've struggled with the fact that many years of my seem to have vanished... been lost, since surgery. I don't remember a lot of my high school years (perhaps a good thing), and sadly, Terron's early years. His first milestones... steps, words, etc. are all left to my own imagination, and pictures. It crushes me.
I recently reunited with an elementary school friend of mine, on Facebook. After moving as a child, about 10 years of lost contact, I got the chance to see her, during the period of time that I was having seizures. Now, another 10 years later, I've even seen pictures of us, and our kids playing together... I might as well be looking at a strangers' pictures, because looking at us doesn't bring back the memories.
Why I'd expect the following to be different, I'm not sure...
Yesterday, I participated in the Etobicoke Masters swim meet, the first of the season. While not as exciting to me as triathlon, or road races, still fun to cheer on the people that I swim with each week, and a good way to see how I'm doing. Much more relaxed this time than last year, being my second meet... or so I thought.
I arrived at the Etobicoke Olympium, a little intimidated. I knew my events though, because I had selected them, so I knew I'd be fine.Into the water for a quick warm up, trying to get a feel for everything new, I calmed down relatively easily. Over the next few hours, I swam in 6 events, PR'ing in each of my individual swims, and placing in age group!
1st place -- 100m free 1:29.72
2nd place -- 200m free 3:16.93 2nd place -- 400m free 7:02.25
2nd place -- 50m free 40.08
3rd place -- Mixed 200m free relay
3rd place -- Mixed 200m medley relay
Last night, I got a call from one of my very best friends from high school... and quickly told her about my morning.
C: "Where was the meet?"
Me: "Etobicoke Olympium"
C: "Really? We swam there, remember?"
Me: "We did? When? Why?"
C: "For a swim meet, in school. Remember?"
Me: Silence...then "I did a meet in high school? I was on a swim team then? *sigh* No. I don't remember." Hmmm, wonder if I was any good??
My 8% seems a whole lot bigger somedays...
28 comments:
You do such a great job with continuing forward with your life and I can't even begin to imagine how hard it can be at times.
Congrats on your races!
That must be difficult...I can't even imagine going through what you've been through. You are amazing and I really really hope I can meet you in person in Ottawa in May :) :)
That had to be hard. Big hugs!
Well luckily you are filling up that 8% with all kinds of new memories and experiences! Okay, so it probably doesn't work quite like that, but you KWIM. ;)
Huge congrats on cleaning up at the swim meet!!
Wow.... Kind of like having Alzheimers and realizing it. Continue with strength...as you have been doing
It must be very difficult 'losing' parts of your life like that...at least you're making a bunch of awesome new memories though...congrats on all your PR's and placings!
You are so inspiring, I can't imagine how hard that must be! You do such a great job of looking forward and making new memories.
Congrats on the awesome swim meet!
Mel, wait until you get my age!!! Woman, you are making way more than 8% more memories right now.
I'm sure you look at it more in terms of the 92% rather than the 8. Good job at the meet.
It's not fair that you had to give up 8% to regain a sense of freedom for your life that most people take for granted (having not had seizures, I'm sure I do). But all things being equal, i think you ended up ahead.
*hugs*
That's ammazing Mel. you keep trucking on.
Good job on the meet!
dude, i wish i could erase high school! ;) kidding aside, i know it can't always be easy/a joke like that. congrats on sweeping up all those ribbons! melanie phelps!
Awesome job on the swim meet! I can only imagine how hard losing 8% is...hugs!
great job! Thanks for sharing your situation....I've got some close family with similar medical condition. I can't imagine it. Keep on!
{{{HUGS}}} that is for the remembered Good Memories....
Even if you don't remember some things Mel, I bet by looking at the photo's and reconnecting with people who DO remember will help even if in a small way to fit the pieces together and make sense of the wonderful woman you are today!!
Woohoo! Ribbons for AG placement! Love it!
*hugs*
Yeah but look at all these cool memories you're making now!
Congrats on your success at the swim meet!
You are a strong person and an inspiration to many.
Congrats on the swim meet! You kicked some major booty out there!
You're such a strong woman!
You never cease to amaze me!! Way to go on your swim meet :)
Congrats on the swim meet... how I miss those days!
it must be very hard...but don't give up...just keep going..
--I prefer running without shoes. My toes didn't get cold. Besides, if I'm in front from the start, no one can step on them. ~Michelle Dekkers - arteryx jackets
Wow, that must be an extremely odd feeling to look at pictures knowing that you did those things, but having no memories of them. You sounds like a very strong woman.
Congrats on your races AND PR's AND AG group placements!
You should record your results and training with this brand new application. Definitely the best one i have seen.
220 TriLog for the iPhone!
iTunes Link:
http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/220-trilog/id405993632?mt=8&uo=4
Thanks for sharing your story...:>)!!
Life is too short and we have to make the most of every day.......thanks for sharing your story....your whole 8% story really touches a nerve with me..for so many reasons
on the plus side you don't remember all the other stuff that happens in high school which scars many of us :) what's so great though is the new memories you are making and that you have great friends who have known you long enough to help fill in blanks
Great story. Sorry for your memory loss. If you could choose what 8% you wanted to forget it would not be so bad (maybe good) but when you can not choose which memories that sucks.
Kevin
http://halftriing.blogspot.com/
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